Welcome to our Family Zachary!

Today is the Day!  This day, Monday, November 27, 2018 will forever be one that is celebrated as the day where the Lockheads are COMPLETE as a Family.

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When you first start working on a jigsaw puzzle, it takes a little while to even get the pieces all turned over and sorted out. But for this puzzle, the top of the box has been misplaced and you’re not exactly sure what the end result will look when you’re finished.  The image that the finished puzzle is to represent is impossible to decipher from all of the confusion scattered about the table.  Then, you get to work…maybe you even pour yourself a cold dring, crack a beer or pour a glass of wine.  This might take some time and effort!

Then, the pieces start fitting together – slowly at first, starting usually with the edges, so that a well defined, strong frame begins to take shape.  A few pieces making a length of edge over here, and perhaps a solid corner or two over there.  Distinct groups of pieces start coming together, not joined continuously around the border yet, but in noticeably larger and larger bunches.

Some pieces almost join themselves, fitting smoothly and quickly together. Other pieces seem like they should link easily, but for some reason, they don’t exactly mesh.  So, you keep trying, keep moving the pieces and the larger segments of the picture around the table, always squinting at the image that begins to emerge from the chaos.  Trying to imagine what it will look like when it’s done.

Before you know it, the frame is complete. The finished edges and four corners provide the stability and structure to help contain the rest of the pieces, as they find their places in the picture.  You stand back for a moment and have a look at what you can see so far.  At a distance, you can begin to see from the colors and textures of of the image that it will a beautiful picture.  But, It’s not finished yet.  You need to take a break and rest for a moment or two. And, as you glance at the glass in your hand, it’s empty. Time to refill and re-energize.

As you return to the table, you notice that there are a couple of pieces that have inadvertently fallen onto the floor.  You carefully scoop them up, dust them off and add them back to the mix.  The image would never have been complete without them, so it’s fortunate that they have been found.

And sure enough, one of the re-discovered pieces ends up being an “Aha!” link. One critical piece that joins three or four larger segments. Segments that you couldn’t easily see fitting together before.  Of course, now they fit together perfectly as the image that’s not on the box comes into clearer focus.

There are also times when, no matter what, you can’t get things to fit together.  You need to ask for some help getting it done.  So, you grab your phone to make a call, send an email or text to a friend, post a message on your timeline, or send a PM.  You do something – anything – to try to find someone else who has their own puzzle to see if they ever got jammed up like you have.  You visit your neighbor, your pastor, your family trying to get things sorted out so that the pieces start fitting together again.  Hopefully, you’re able to find the help you need to get back on track and start slowly fitting pieces back together…

You’re getting closer and closer, there are fewer and fewer pieces left to fit in. But there’s this one small section, in the lower left, that’s just not right.  The pieces seemed to fit when you first put them together a while ago, but something’s just a little bit caddywampus (love that word!).  So you take two or three of the misfit pieces, shuffle them around for a moment, and sure enough, they DO mesh – just not in the way you originally thought.

So here we are…

The Lockhead puzzle travels quite a bit – we take it with us wherever we go.  Our picture is almost complete, but it is one that we could not have imagined ever being ours 15 years ago. The frame is solid, and has provided structure and strength so that we have been able to fit our pieces together – eventually. There is just one small area, just a handful of pieces that we need to fit together to finish.  Our picture looks like a family portrait, with just one more face left to come into focus.  It doesn’t look like any other family portrait we’d ever seen, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

We are very fortunate to have been able to count on our families, friends, and neighbors to support us as we have assembled our puzzle and grown our Family. Thanks to everyone who’s played a role.

Don’t worry, it’s not over – in fact, it’s just beginning!  Zach is now a Lockhead.

Welcome to the Panda Party little man.

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Our first morning in Changsha would be the first morning of the rest of Zachary’s Life as a Lockhead.  We attacked the new Breakfast buffet as we usually do, especially after our late, makeshift dinner last night.

Our guide Steve, met us in the lobby at 10 sharp for the short ride to the Hunan Adoption Affairs Offices.

Our large group filled the smallish, sparse room.  There were two black leather couches, and a handful of bright red stools – they looked stylish- like oversized golf tees with footrests!  We waited anxiously, while Kyle and Ashley acted as sentries, checking the hall every few seconds.  There was a man, unrelated to our meeting, pacing the halls and speaking loudly on his phone, triggering a few false alarms.  All eyes and ears were focused intently on the elevator doors.

Adoption paperwork…Check.  Gifts for the Director and nanny…Check.  Cameras at the ready…Check. Butterflies in stomach…Check.

The elevator settled on our floor, and the doors opened (at least that’s what happened, as described by Ashley and Kyle!). From my angle, I saw Zachary’s Nanny first, then the Orphnage Director, THEN I saw little Zachary, between them!  His little arms stretched upwards holding their hands, standing just thigh-high to both.

He came in, surveyed the situation, and decided to hang around, despite seeing what must have been a tremendously intimidating group of big people.  Even the kids were big, to him.  His face was cute as could be – cuter even than in the many pictures and videos we saw over the past 10 months.  He is a petite little fellow – Lisa is concerned that he clothes we brought would need to be rolled up/down to be able to fit!

As our crew tried to inch closer to smother him with love, he withdrew, finding corners to retreat to, and convenient legs to hide behind.  It only took a few moments before he began warming up to the kids.  With help from his nanny, he  shared small snacks with each of us; carefully picking them out of the bag and dropping them into our hands, being careful not to make actual hand contact!

He also shared small oranges and small bags of cookies with the children as well.  He remained tentative usually backing himself into the counter and even gently bumping his head on the edge of the counter occasionally.  The kids were GREAT, easily and quickly finding the right balance of interaction and patience.  The head knocks didn’t seem to bother Zach – which is good, because as the littlest brother, there are a lifetime of them coming his way!

It didn’t take long before Lisa and I peeled off top take take of signing the documents. After seeing how our pieces started fitting together right before our eyes, we couldn’t sign fast enough!

The time we spent in that small room seemed timeless, but it melted away so quickly.  We were able to capture these forever moments in videos and pictures to share with Zachary later.  The Nanny and the Director began to gather their belongings as our kids distracted Zachary and kept him out of direct line of sight to them. And just like that – they were gone.

Once he realized he was completely outnumbered and his reinforcements had retreated, he got really upset.  BUT, only for a few moments!  I scooped him up in my (Dad) arms, and walked him around the room as our kids tried to help comfort him.  He lashed out just a bit, but as soon as we left the room he realized that he may have been a bit hasty in his reaction!!

Once he started to see that he was leaving WITH everyone, all together, he switched into observation mode.  He was mostly checking out what was happening and just watching everything.  You could almost hear his gears spinning, “Hmmm, let’s just play this out and see what happens…”

I held him outside on the curb, bathed in the warm sunshine of the morning (the smog/haze had begun to lift a bit), as the rest of the kids filed into our bus – he watched intently – and then we boarded after everyone was on and seated.  I carried him to the back of the bus, and sat in the last row, so that he could see everyone in front of him, and didn’t need to turn around to check on anyone either.

He was quiet and very observant all the way back to the hotel.  Things were finally starting to click, as everyone took turns holding his hand (or trying to)!  He walked with us to the elevators as we said goodbye to Steve for a while, and headed upstairs.

Steve gave us some directions to the local Carrefour and we walked down to see what we could find.  We are looking for a stroller, for Zachary since his little legs likely are not accustomed to walking like we will be walking these next two weeks.  We also want to see how much we can get the other kids fighting over who will be pushing Zachary in his new stroller!!!  THAT should be fun…

We made a few snack (with a bottle of wine for AM/UC) purchases and then headed back, stroller-less for the time being.  On the walks to and from Zachary was a complete trooper, taking in the sights and sounds of Changsha!  He was holding hands with whoever wanted to take a turn! A trip to Wal-Mart will hopefully be in the cards tomorrow to find said stroller. As Lisa mentioned, he’s a bit smaller that we’d thought he’d be, so we’ll make adjustments and move one. (One of those puzzle pieces that we thought would fit but didn’t!)

The afternoon was a quiet one after returning, with the kids taking turns playing with Zachary, introducing him to some of his new toys, and watching iPod videos with him.  He seemed more and more comfortable and content and at ease with everyone.  He gave the room a good once-over trying to tough everything he could reach, because he could!  I can’t imagine what’s going through his mind right now, but hopefully the panic will pass, he’ll switch out of survival mode before too long, and start to realize how much love surrounds him.

After R&R, the kids played with him in the Hotel’s kids playroom for a little while.  He seemed happy with his abilities to negotiate the play structures.  After playtime, we walked about four longish blocks to have dinner at Pizza Hut! Zachary ate like a champ. Ryan shared some of his spaghetti, Ashley shared some of her apple slices, and he downed at least a couple of slices of Pizza!  Even with his wrist issues, he can manage a fork and spoon, though he’ll be better when we get more age-appropriate utensils.

We headed back in the cooler evening air, enjoying the walk back to the hotel.  As the unusual sight that we are on the streets of a city like Changsha, we got our usual share of attention and stares.  We’re used to it…  This was all offset by a brief interaction that Zachary and I had as we exited Pizza Hut.  An older Chinese woman (likely a grandmother herself), caught my eye, and said something in Mandarin as she smiled very brightly. I smiled back as I held Z’s hand, and replied with my usual “Wo bu dong” (“I don’t understand…”).  She understood that I had no clue as to what she said, and she almost laughed out load, repeating “Ha-Ha,  Wo bu dong.”  Then she pointed to Zachary, then to me, gave us a big thumbs-up, smiled again and disappeared into the crowd.  Witness the art of communicating without conversing.  It’s the little moments like this that make these trips so very special!

After we pulled in to the hotel, it was bath and shower time. Zachary really enjoyed his first bubble bath and slipped easily into his new pajamas and hotel slippers!  Soon he had his teeth brushed, and was tucked neatly under the covers, fading quickly!

And so it goes for Day 1 as a Lockhead for our new Son, Zachary.

As unforgettable as it was simple.

Welcome aboard, Zach.